Thinking of You
by Spring Emerald
Summary: When I'm with him, I am thinking of You... 'I'll see you, Hotaru.' His smile can rival the city lights. 'See you, my love.' I returned his smile.


**Disclaimer: I do not own Gakuen Alice. And the song is by Katy Perry.**

**Thinking of you**

**Ruka x Hotaru, Hotaru x Hayate**

**Enjoy!  
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Thinking of you

**Comparisons are easily done**

**Once you've had the taste of perfection**

Loneliness draped over Hotaru as she opened her eyes to the warm, shining rays of the morning sun, a dreary morning after a sinful night. She heaved a deep sigh then turned to her left to find a man sprawled in his stomach, the comforter only covering his lower half.

_'Good morning, honey.' His eyes burned mine with pure affection. I've never received such a loving sight before, only from him._

_'Good morning.' I said as I fully faced him. My hand molded in his perfectly sculpted face, afraid that I might lose it, on both context of the phrase. Everything was perfect._

_He smiled as he cupped my hands with his._

_'Better get ready.'_

Hotaru turned again to her right and stood up from the bed, only covered in a blanket. The bed creaked noisily, which made the man utter a soft grunt. She didn't mind for she was busy dressing up.

"Good morning, babe."

She didn't respond, as she went to the vanity to fix and freshen up her appearance. Then she put on her shoes and in less than a minute she was out of the door.

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**You said move on where do I go**

**I guess second best is all I will know…**

This had been going on for three years, everyday forlorn after a heinous act the previous night. Everyday, she would leave without saying a word, mix with the busy streets of Tokyo, but every night she would find her self in front of his doorsteps and moments later in his king sized bed.

_'Why can't I go? I want to save them too.' I demanded._

_He grabbed my shoulders, shaking me furiously._

_"I can't afford to lose you, Hotaru! I can't.' His tone was strained._

_'What? Do you think I can afford to lose you, huh Ruka?' I said as I took his hand off my shoulders. He seemed to calm for a moment but he held my shoulders again._

_'Please, Hotaru.' his eyes begging for understanding. I can't refuse those eyes, not especially when it's tainted with genuine plead and worry._

_'Promise me, you'll come back.' I said as I cupped his face in my small, cold hands. I was holding my tears back. He kissed my palm._

_'I promise.' Then he mirrored my action and gave me a long, passionate kiss. After that, he left. _

_But the kiss left a different sensation._

_Anxiety._

_Separation._

_Departure._

She woke up with a splitting headache. She didn't realize that she slept on her work. Why did she have to sleep during work hours and why did she have to dream about that. No wait, it was a nightmare. A familiar painful and depressing feeling tugged her heart. But she shook it off and went back to her work.

_After a week, I received a telegram, saying that he was ambushed along with my best friend and her boyfriend while escaping the AAO._

_The world destructed before my eyes. I was suffocated with the pain engulfing me. A delusional part of my brain was convincing me that maybe, maybe he's still alive, somewhere out there, beneath the shadows. But there's no escape from reality. It's here, he's gone along with the two other people special to me and I am destructed._

_Crumpling the letter, I went outside on the chilly night of November and went to the morgue where they were in. The next thing I know, I was lying on a hospital bed and was unconscious for almost two weeks._

_That's where he came in. Hayate._

A lone tear traveled through her pale smooth cheek, which she brushed off angrily.

Anger for her weakness.

Anger for her vulnerability.

Anger for herself.

She can't move on. She will not. She will rot and be stuck on being like this forever.

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**He kissed my lips, I taste your mouth.**

**He put me in I was disgusted with myself.**

"You smell so good, Hotaru."

Hayate was sniffing lustfully the expanse of her neck, while she remained rigid and unaffected.

"Will you just start already?" she asked dully.

He chuckled, and then traced kisses from her neck to her jaw line.

"Patience is a virtue, babe. But with someone like you, how can I refuse?"

He then attacked her lips.

'_You…taste like vanilla.' I said amused as we parted from our steaming kiss to fill up some air._

_He smiled. 'Glad you liked it.' And our lips found each other again._

Her fingers dug on his back as he was trying to please her. Moans after moans resounded in the room as she was approaching her peak. Then she screamed.

Hayate chuckled again.

"You're beautiful." He said, panting heavily above her and traveled with his kisses again.

'_You're beautiful, no, exquisite.' Ruka said, panting heavily above me while he wiped the tears of pain confuse with sheer joy. I smiled at him, and he started yet again._

She let her tears flow, tears of pain, hate and absolute disgust.

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'**Coz when I'm with him I am thinking of you**

**What you would do if you were the one who was spending the night**

**I wish that I was looking into your eyes**

**Burst in the door and take me away**

**No more mistakes**

It was again, another day of misery and hurt. But tonight will be different.

She was standing in front of his grave, smiling contentedly, as she swore to stop all her madness.

'I'll be there, Ruka.' She thought as she looked up to the clear and bright cerulean sky.

His eyes.

**Coz in your eyes I'd like to stay.**

_'I'll see you, Hotaru.' His smile could rival the city lights._

_'See you, my love.' I returned her smile_

She closed her eyes. Tomorrow will be better.

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**There you have it!**

**Hope that you enjoy reading.**

**Please review.**

**Uhmm...this is actually a combination of 1st person and 3rd person POV. **

**I- Hotaru's memories/Flashback told by Hotaru herself.**

**B-Song lyrics. Please keep in mind though that this is not the full lyrics. I only used what i felt was appropriate for the story.**

**Thanks, everyone!**

**Spring Emerald**

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